Families as A Guideline for Children According to Tarbiyahtul

This study aims to examine the role of families in children using the approach found in Kitab Tarbiyatul Aulad Fil Islam. This analysis was conducted by looking at the characters of family members found in the novel “....Rahsia Dhia!” by Mustapha which is the winning novel of the Hadiah Sastera Perdana Malaysia (HSPM). The importance of this study is because the children are easily influenced by the treatment of family members when they see something good or bad in their lives. The act of imitating this behavior can also occur during the reading process of children especially through novels that are known to have a very significant impact on the reader compared to other literary genres. In this regard, this study will also apply the approach of education of children according to Islam expressed by Ulwan in the book Tarbiyatul Aulad Fil Islam as a form of guidance to family members in educating children's behavior. The selection of this approach is seen to coincide with the need for a framework based on Islam to evaluate novels written by Muslim authors, as well as read by the majority of Muslims. This approach demonstrates five family roles to be analyzed which are examples of noble character, examples of humility, examples of worship, exemplary conduct, and physical examples. Thus, every aspect of the novel proves that the role of families presented in children's novels is following the norms of the life of children in Malaysia.


Introduction
Nowadays, parents are always faced with various challenges in managing the family, especially in educating children. This is so because of the existence of negative influences that can contaminate children's thoughts and ways of socializing if they are not fully monitored by family members. It also demands that mothers and fathers be examples to children in doing any daily activities.
According to Junaidi et al (2018) family members are one of the special environments that can affect the development of children's behavior and emotions. It's shown that mothers and fathers are the first references in the formation of daily attitudes and practices. Meanwhile, Hafidzin (2019) thinks that children like to imitate their mother's behavior since they were 3 years old. They will follow the behavior of the mother or father and it's been categorized as imitating. Imitation is a child's learning process. It was found that they mimicked movement before mimicking speech. According to Taklimudin (2018), parents are an ideal example in the eyes of children. Behavior, manners will be imitated, backed up as well as all this will be inherent in the children themselves and their feelings. Both speeches, deeds, sensory as well as spiritual will also imitate both of their mother and father. It's shown that family members, especially mothers and fathers, play a big role as a reference for children so that their attitudes and personalities are shaped towards the values of goodness in line with the demands of Islam.
In this regard, it is known that reading material is also one of the important components in the education of children which are known to convey the value of goodness and advice through the process of reading. However, to cultivate a love of reading in these children, it is necessary to imitate the actions they see, such as reading activities done by parents can attract children to do the same. According to Mohamed and Bacotang (2014) surrounding people are important in playing a role to children because they learn about reading and writing through interaction and observation with older people. To ensure that to form children who are diligent readers also needs to be applied through exemplary aspects where mothers and fathers are first diligent in reading so that children feel close to the reading material. Through this act of reading the child can learn the noble values and will apply the act in the activities performed throughout their life.

Problem Statement
It is stated that children will be more likely to imitate what they have seen, heard, or read based on their environment. Thus, with this act of imitation, it is feared that it will cause them to be influenced by things that should not be followed thus forming unhealthy symptoms in society. According to Ahmad (2006), children are given the ability to imitate since infancy such as imitating facial expressions, behaviors performed by others, and what they remember. It's also been stated by Jaafar (2008) that is, through television children can learn to imitate obscene words, abusive language, insults, despised, and many other words that contradict the culture, which seen to reduce the ability of children to think as well as weaken their verbal skills. It is clear that children have been born with an imitative attitude and it is not impossible that if a child is exposed to something negative, they will start imitating the act.
In line with that, the study of exemplary aspects in this novel is seen as appropriate to educate children to become members of society who are devoted to the family, country, and religion. According to Ishak (2005), argues that popular reading materials and always read by children are newspapers, comics, novels, magazines, and activity books. Through this statement, it is clear that the novel genre is more popular with children than other genres in the field of children's literature such as short stories, dramas, and poetry. Besides that, according to Abdullah (2007), children aged between 9-12 years old who already can read will choose the genre of novels to replace the oral stories they hear. Therefore, it is appropriate to research the application of exemplary aspects in children's novels because this genre is closer to children's lives and is certainly able to have a profound effect on their intellectual growth and physical development.

Limitations of the Study
Therefore, this study is limited to the novel "....Rahsia Dhia!" only as a study because this children's novel was once crowned as the recipient of the Malaysian Premier Literary Prize (HSPM) in 2014/2015. It is known that this novel also won the first prize in the Children and Youth Novel Writing Competition 2013, organized by the Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka Cooperative. Therefore, it is appropriate to research novels that have won many awards for this writing. It is known that this tells the story of a disabled child character named Dhia who is been described as a person who is resilient in the face of life's trials.
Dhia's perseverance that been shown in this novel is a manifestation of the people around her who have influenced her to always strive to achieve success despite being limited by her imperfect physical condition. Self-strength inspired by worship, morality, generosity, decency, and firmness of stance makes Dhia a resilient human being in solving problems faced every day. The character is described as a mature child and ready to face the challenges of life even though she is categorized as a person with a physical disability.

Methodology
In that regard, the study also uses a research framework from a book which been written by Ulwan (1996), who is a well-known religious figure in Syria and has produced many books related to children's education. According to Al-Albani (1996: xviii) who argues that never has a writer written so sharply and boldly on the topic of children's education as Al-Ustaz Shaykh Abdullah Ulwan did. Due to his prominence in the field of children's education, the book Tarbiyahtul Aulad Fil Islam is used as a guide for children's education according to Islam. One of the important aspects discussed in this book is related to the example of family members as the education of children.
According to Ulwan (1996), exemplary is the most important factor in children's education because children's behavior, namely good and bad is pick up from the educator imitated in actions, manners that educators are aware of, or not aware of. Therefore, the biggest example as a Muslim is the noble personality of Rasulullah SAW who is also the focal guide of the book Tarbiyahtul Aulad Fil Islam in discussing the aspect of exemplary. Stated that this aspect of example is divided into five parts, namely the example of worship, the example of noble morals, the example of generosity, the example of decency, and the physical example that is based on the personality of the Prophet Muhammad SAW:

Examples of Worship
The first exemplary aspect that can be seen in this children's novel that has been studied is the example of worship. Ulwan (1996), explained that the exemplary aspect of worship according to a hadith from Imam Bukhari and Muslim narrated from Al-Mughirah bin Syu'bah RA that the Prophet SAW always got up at night (tahajud prayer) until the swelling of both soles of his feet. This makes Rasulullah SAW an example of worship in the execution of every command of Allah SWT from tahajud, worship, tasbih, remembrance and prayer. Apart from that, Asy-Syaikhani also narrated from Alqamah "I asked Aisyah RA, 'did Rasulullah SAW specialize the day (meant to increase worship)? She replied, 'no, he works continuously. What Rasulullah SAW did, you can also do". This shows that the actions of the Prophet Muhammad SAW in performing this worship in earnest should be used as an example to Muslims, especially children. In line with that, this exemplary act of worship can be traced in the novel "....Rahsia Dhia!" via the quote below "Yes, mama! Dhia always prays, for Dhia to be a wise and clever person. And so on…" Dhia stopped talking. She contemplated her mother's face. "Like who, Dhia?" Mrs. Dalilah asked. "Like papa, mama." (Mustapha, 2014) Based on the passage, it is clear that the exemplary act of worship displayed by the author through the character "papa" in the novel "....Rahsia Dhia!" has taught her daughter to always pray for success. This is because success is a gift from Allah SWT to the servants that He wants through hard work and continuous efforts made so that the dreamed desire is achieved. This matter is highlighted through the character of "papa" which clearly shows a good example as a true Muslim to children in performing worship as a daily routine in line with the example of the Prophet SAW.

Example of Morality
Next, another aspect of an example that has been identified in this novel is the example of noble morals. According to Ulwan (1996) the concept of exemplary noble morals is related to the good character shown by the Prophet SAW from his greatness, namely good relations, asceticism, generosity, humility, strength, courage, and relationships. According to Al-Hasyami (2012), the noble morality of gentleness has a very close relationship with the nature of patience. These two attributes are almost identical and because of that, these two words (al-hilmu and ash-shabru) are often used to refer to the same meaning. According to Abdullah (2006), what is meant by morality (al-khuluq) is the character (as-sajiyyah) and tabi'at (atthab '). The word al-khuluq according to the language is something that has become a habit of a person in the form of manners.
"Be patient!" she whispered. She always remembered her mother's message, that this life must be filled with patience to face various trials and tribulations. Dhia also knows life is not easy, as mama always reminded her. (Mustapha, 2014) Based on the passage mention, it is clearly shown that the example of noble morals through the nature of patience is shown through Dhia's character. This act is an example of an exemplary from her mother who instructed her daughter to always be patient while facing life's trials. It is found that the character of Dhia is reminded to apply the value of patience because life is a test that needs to go through with the value of patience before achieving happiness. However, thanks to her mother's advice, Dhia still maintains patience in facing challenges and trials. The noble moral example nurtured by her mother can strengthen Dhia's personality as a child who upholds the nature of patience.

Example of Generosity
Next, another exemplary aspect identified in this novel is the example of generosity. According to Ulwan (1996), Rasulullah SAW was a very generous person and he often gave without fear of scarcity and poverty as likened to the wind that blows and many more been implemented in the month of Ramadan. He further stressed that Rasulullah SAW was very ascetic even if pleasure was desired then the whole world would submit to him. Rasulullah also taught the Muslim generation to often give help and sacrifice as well as put others first to emulate the next generation to appreciate and not be lulled by the life of the world.
"Did you get it from Pak Su Mat, Dhia?" "I want to buy from Pak Su Mat, but he gave it to me as a gift when he knew I wanted to use it to wave the Jalur Gemilang," explained Dhia happily. "Wow, lucky you, Dhia!" Nana shared the joy. (Mustapha, 2014) Based on the stated passage it is clearly shown that the example of generosity displayed by the author in this novel is through the character of Pak Su Mat when he presents Dhia with some bamboo sticks. It is stated that Dhia's character needs some equipment such as bamboo sticks and flags to carry out the task given by her school teacher to produce a design in conjunction with the Independence Day celebration. It was found that Dhia initially wanted to buy the bamboo from Pak Su Mat, but after explaining her purpose in using the bamboo to wave the Jalur Gemilang, Pak Su Mat generously gave the bamboo without being charged anything. This clearly shows the generous attitude of Pak Su Mat as a person who has the characteristics of generosity that can eventually be an inspiration to Dhia as a child. This is clearly in line with the exemplary advice from Rasulullah SAW to all his ummah.

Exemplary Impact
Next, identified also in this novel is an example of decency. According to Ulwan (1996), the example of politeness was shown by Rasulullah SAW who was polite to the enemy even after he had won. This politeness also made the Prophet never retaliate for bad deeds to the people of Mecca who had tortured, oppressed, expelled, and conspired to kill him. In addition, Rasulullah gathered the people of Mecca and protected them, and said to them "What do you see from my treatment of you? They replied, "Your Majesty. Noble nephew "Rasulullah SAW said," Go, you are all free people ". It can be seen that the politeness that is to be outlined here is the politeness of serving the enemy when the Prophet SAW himself glorified people who once hurt him and this is a good example and should be followed by all mankind.
"Oh, forgive us, Kak Salmi! We got the wrong house. Forgive us, yes, "said Sue Lin. "It's okay, dear. Go to the house next door. Usually, Dhia will be at her home in the evening like this," explained Kak Salmi politely. "Thank you, Sis," replied Kaveeta. (Mustapha, 2014) In line with that, it clearly shows that the example of decency shown by the author in this novel is through the character of Kak Salmi to Dhia's friends, namely Sue Lin and Kaveeta. It was found that Sue Lin and Kaveeta wanted to visit Dhia at her house on one evening but they mistakenly the house when they went to Kak Salmi's house because they thought the house was Dhia's house. Kak Salmi's politeness was seen when she did not scold the children despite being bothered at the time, in fact, she also generously showed the direction of Dhia's house using polite language. Thus, the exemplary nature shown by this character is indeed a practice recommended by the Prophet SAW to everyone even to his own enemies.

Physical Example
Next, the exemplary aspect detected in this novel is the physical exemplary. According to Ulwan (1996), Rasulullah SAW had wrestled with the Rukanah wrestling champion three times and caused the wrestling champion to recite Shahadah because of Rasulullah SAW's physical strength. It is also said that when the companions dug a ditch there was a large stone that could not be shatter using a hammer and axe, they went to the Prophet to solve the problem. Therefore, it is seen that the physical strength of Rasulullah SAW cannot be matched by anyone and this has also been stated through several events that test the strength of Rasulullah SAW.  (Mustapha, 2014) This clearly shows the physical example found in the novel through Dhia's character when the disabled child states that her shortcomings will not prevent her from achieving success. It is depicted in the novel that Dhia's character is a disabled student when part of her right hand has no fingers. Despite having a physical disability, it does not make the child give up on her abilities and always believes in the abilities and strengths she has to keep trying. Understandably, an exemplary attitude is when one is always grateful for physical well-being and used it towards goodness.

Conclusion
After the analysis was done on the novel "....Rahsia Dhia!"; the study found that the novel indeed contains examples of educators who can shape, strengthen the identity and personality of children. Based on the approach from Abdullah in his book Tarbiyatul Aulad Fil Islam has helped to give a good understanding of the role of the family to readers, especially parents in educating children. Through the five exemplary aspects that have been discussed, it is clear that all of these aspects have examples from the novels studied. Therefore, it can be said that this children's novel does indeed apply the exemplary aspect that can be exemplify during the reading process takes place. Thus, this matter reinforces the priority of example as a guideline in children's lives. The role of literary works as a vehicle in conveying role models is very meaningful in the development of the country's literature, especially in the genre of children's literature.